Now That's GOTTA Hurt!

Dangerous Sports correspondent Hugh Pain writes. Well hello, death defiers everywhere. I'm on Anhur, reporting from the Pygohert gravel pit on the latest nerve-tingling event to hit the Cosmos. It's name? Gravel Rash. Basically, it involves the competitor removing his lower garments, leaving his nether regions 'as God intended', and then sliding down courses composed of scree and loose stones as fast as possible. Courses range from beginner (shallow gradient, limestone) to black (1:2) gradient, grainte chips mixed with broken glass). As you can imagine, Synthi Skin is in hot demand, most especially by reigning champion Arfa 'Soprano' Bellgon.