Oh, what a performance!

Oh, what a performance! is a News Bulletin by Lucy Stultus posted to the Commerce and Communications Network in 2790. It does not impact commodity prices.

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Oh, what a performance!
Says Lucy Stultus.
Mums! Are your offspring driving you beyond the levels of socially-permitted abnormal behaviour with their petulance and whining? Don't you just wish that there was a wholesome and cheap form of entertainment could divert their hyperactive minds for more than three minutes? Then perhaps you should consider visiting Jacques, performance artist par excellence. With his traditional blanched face and bobbly hat, Jacques will keep them quiet for ages with his repertoire of classic mime, such as 'Man walking in the wind', 'Where did these walls come from?', and 'The Rape of the Sabine Women'. Don't delay, see Jacques today!